The Public Transit Code

I confess...that I get quite annoyed when people around me refuse to follow the "rules" on the T (Boston's public transit system). This may be a tad unfair since the rules are primarily in my head. To help remedy this injustice, I'll detail some rules here:

• My body beats your book/bag/whatever -- Look, I know the ride can be a bit dull, but if the only way you can read is to do so with your book jamming into my back, then you simply shouldn't be reading. Likewise, and this rule goes especially towards women and anyone toting a backpack, bodies beat bags. Bags and such should be adjusted to accommodate bodies...I should not have to contort to avoid your purse. Your Prada may have a higher market value than I do, but I still win.
• Sharing equals caring -- If you are seated in an end seat next to a half-partition that separates you from a mass of standing people, you should keep your hands neatly tucked in your lap. You should not drape over the side of said partition, taking space away from a crowd of standing folks. You are the lucky seated one, be considerate. As to those standing, if it isn't necessary to cross over the partition, don't. I won't even mention the "I'm so macho, I have to sit with my legs a foot apart" folks.
• Holding, not hugging -- The poles are there to hold, not to give a full body embrace that effectively prevents anyone else from holding on. If the train's empty, hug away. But if other people need to hold on, then limit the pole PDA.
• We feel enough like cattle, quit the cud -- I chew way more gum than I should. But I don't do it where my mouth is an inch from someone else's ear. I don't want to hear you smacking away for 20 minutes.
• I don't care if you use Dial -- But for goodness sakes, use some sort of deodorant. None of us are daisy-fresh at the end of the day, but there's reasonable and there's the rest.
• Little doesn't mean I lose out-- I'm on the smaller end. But I still get some space. Just because the person next to you takes up a bit less space, doesn't give you leave to push into their seat/standing room/head/whatever. I fully appreciate that the seats don't fit most modern behinds, but why do I always seem to be the one paying the price for that? Don't punish me...I already punish myself in pre-5AM workout sessions...
• No, there is NOT more room -- If you don't fit, you wait. Simple enough.

There are more. But that's a start. Consider yourself warned. I now feel even more justified in my angry glare