I decided I needed some protein. This wasn't wrong. Thinking I could handle a jar of PB in the house, however, was. I was fine with it last night... I did have more than one PB 'wich but I needed it. Today though...yeah...eating 3/4 a jar of PB will NOT help matters. I did not need the guilt on top of the rest. I know I need to "let it go" but I'm not so good at that (and I manage to feel guilty about that too!!). I didn't expect the temporary scale drop in the first few days of being sick to last, I knew it wouldn't, but I really don't want to come out of this higher. Though just coming FULLY out of this mess is the first priority.
Lesson -- Do give your body what it needs (i.e. protien) but don't give your mind a challenge when your body's already down (i.e. a jar of PB when it is totally not a food I'm safe around).
Status -- I felt a good bit better last night but pretty crappy again today.
Reflection -- I DO think I needed the medicine when I took it. I DO believe that sometimes our brains need help to be balanced, just like a diabetic may need insulin. I just never imagined I'd still feel like crap a week later.
Moving ahead -- When I'm better, I do want to start a committed program to get to my best body. I have numbers in my head but want to try to focus more on just feeling like my body is where it belongs. Which it isn't at the current weight. I know I'm still considered small by most standards, but I also know my body looked and felt and performed better at a lighter size.